Monday, March 3, 2008

For Matthew Joshua

My sweet Angel,

3 months ago you came into this world sleeping that day i will never ever forget i looked at you and felt complete love and grief all at one moment Love because you were my first born child And grief because I knew i would never see you grow or hear you cry or i would never be able to feel your breath on my face...........Words can not explain how much I wish you were still in my tummy growing strong................I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU MORE THAN ANYONE WILL EVER KNOW..............My Angel........I had a dream about you lastnight It was the first dream i have ever had of you....... You were with your Grandpa Carlo....Standing in the rose garden in the yard of the house i grew up in and I'd say you looked to be about 18 months old maybe a little older.... AND I MUST SAY AS HANDSOME AS COULD BE......As your mother I can say that........I think of you everyday... I always will.... I must stop this letter here....... Be a good boy for me and Hug Brandon and tell him I love him..... Tell Grandma and Grandpa I miss them and love them too. One day we will meet again and I will hold you in my arms....Till then I have you right here in my heart.



Brenda said...

Just wanted to pop over and tell you how very sorry I am that your boys are not still with you.

I will pop back later to read the rest of your story.

Take care. This is a very hard group to be apart of.


Amy said...

That is a beautiful letter. I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I am however glad that you found all of us. Hang in there.

Katie said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your children.

Coggy said...


I came here from Amy's blog. I just wanted to say how sorry I am to read your story. I'm so sorry that you've had to go through this and Brandon and Matthew are not with you as they should be.
C x

meg said...

Lisa, I am so sorry to read about the losses of Matthew and Brandon.

Brenda is right, this is a very hard group to be a part of, but there is a lot of support for you, amongst us all.

I am so very sorry. I lost twins also, and I know how unimaginably difficult this is.

CLC said...

Lisa- I am so sorry for the loss of Brandon and Matthew. There are no words I can say that will comfort you, but please know you will find support here. It's nice to talk to other mothers with similar stories.

Becky said...

We love you so much Matthew. Give Dylan and Riley a big hug from their Momma.

Lisa- you know how I feel about you. And like Brenda said, it's a group that nobody wants to be a part of. For whatever reason, we are. And it sucks.